Brian Nelson's Translator's Note
I found this reading really interesting. Nelson’s Translation Note contained a lot of his philosophy toward approach. I specifically liked the note that a successful translation is built through a “myriad decisions concerning tone, texture, rhythm, register, syntax, sound, connotations: all those things that make up style and reflect the marriage between style and meaning.” It is clear that there is no one hard and fast approach to the work, and that each sentence, word, or phrase must consider a larger purpose, whilst simultaneously giving weight to what the language is doing on an isolated level. Nelson’s note on “foreignization” is also fascinating. The notion that a translation should honour the difference in a piece of non-English phrasing to that of the English is something to consider, and something I look forward to discussing. I recall us briefly discussing this last week, however, where I stand on this I am unsure. What I do agree with, though, is when Nelson writes: “Successful translation of Proust is achieved (unsurprisingly, one might feel) by making him sound like Proust.” While this seems obvious, the goal, as it appears to me, is for the reader to be as unaware as possible that the translator has inserted their own sensibilities and opinions into a piece. I will mention that I am not sure about his title revision: The Way of Swann’s does not improve Swann’s Way, in my opinion.
Shirley Hazzard, Translating Proust
Something I found engaging about Hazzard’s article was the idea of precedence in regard to Scott Moncrieff’s Proust translation. That the need for newness, or as Hazzard puts it, “breaking new ground” is important when approaching a piece. This makes a lot of sense. Bringing new literature to a wider audience solidifies its urgency and purpose. More so, when a translator is the first to engage with a piece, they have the added advantage of authority as well as first engagement to the original (there is less to compare), whereas a revision or subsequent translation has to find a new or better way of communicating the work. If a first translation is full of errors and misinterpretations, then the requirement is clear. However, in the case of Proust and Moncreiff, the success is evident. According to Hazzard, it seems that Moncrieff had the freedom to champion simplicity whilst allowing his own sensibility to style and sentence structure flourish. When compared to the Kilmartin revision and his use of “crepuscular”, the pressure for a translator to make an addition or adjustment for the sake of change becomes an interesting question. I particularly loved the line, “Assiduity has edged out élan.” This seems to encapsulate a great deal of translating philosophy.
Lydia Davis, “Loaf or Hot-Water Bottle”
First thought: I think Nabakov’s alteration of the title, The Walk by Swann’s House, is my favourite so far.
Davis’ note on translating “blind”, was fascinating. More so, the idea of accepting a project that one has not read through or understood in its entirety. I like the sentiment that this process proves to be a “much livelier [experience] for me if I don’t know exactly what’s ahead”. This is how I approach my own fiction. Davis continues to state that isolating herself with the words on the page lends itself to a finely organised intimacy between translator and author. I found it particularly interesting that on the second draft, Davis would seek reference in another translation, and while each sentence was “entirely different at every point” (referring to Moncreiff), she found the aims were similar.
Davis’ essay, and a good deal of other translation notes/ discussions, seem to require some sort of justification as to why this new interpretation is necessary. To show where the shortcomings are located provides room for improvement. Is this a necessity in a translator’s note? Especially when it is in the wake of previous successful editions?
I also really enjoyed Davis’ reference to discoveries and confirmations of language by the people existing within her daily life. Specifically that of her local baker and the translation of boule, whether it can refer to a roll of bread as well as a loaf. This makes me consider the importance of a mentor that knows the language well, and can understand and lend counsel to nuanced and complicated questions.
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